A History of Goods

Once upon a time, there were humans. And humans created. And it was good.

Time passed, and humans kept creating. And it was very good. So good, in fact, that humans no longer wanted their first creations. So they set aside a special place to put these old goods where they could fade into the earth from whence they came. And it was good.

Time passed, and humans continued to create, both new goods and new humans. And humans spread themselves and their goods throughout the earth. And it was very good. But by this time new goods were created so quickly that the old goods did not have proper time to fade into the earth from whence they came. Even from their special places they were getting in the way of humans. So humans decided that they would make new things from old things. And it was good.

Time passed, and humans created all the more, and filled the earth with their goods old and new. And humans created goods that came not from the earth—easily made and easily used—and found them easier to create than use again. But these goods did not as easily fade into the earth, for they came not from it, and were not easily turned into new goods. So the special places filled to the brim and overflowed with these goods.

And it was not good.

Until humans came to the understanding that the earth is precious, and that the greatest good in all the earth was not the newest, but the good that could transcend all the changes from old to new: the good that had always come from the earth itself. This was life. And it was good. And it was so good that humans decided to protect it, no matter the cost.

So time passed, and humans always created, for it is part of being human, but they did so with the entire earth in mind, so that new things were not only very good, but were made to be used again, and to fade into the earth. In this way humans preserved life. And it was very good.

my smile is the child of a truthless old heart

i am a tree
and i have wrenched my own roots
from the land where i have grown.

i have left a hole in my homeland
and have found none to reclaim

or i am frightened
that once i have settled again in the dirt
i will only uproot myself once more
to find another hole
and leave another behind.

In other words, I've been going through separation anxiety. I miss you. A lot. I have been on the verge of tears, longing to be with you: not just emailing and talking on the phone (not that I've been doing that either), but joying in impromptu jam sessions, late-night philosophical and silly discussions, toasts with fair-trade coffee and old lime jell-o, and hugs, hugs, hugs (whether sandwich or otherwise).

I Love you, and I want to be with you fully. But I am afraid that when I return, my hole will no longer be where I left it. I am afraid that I have built for myself a world where I can go anywhere and still miss someone deeply and horribly.

Please, someone, please! Convince me that it is the good and strong and responsible thing to do to come back and be with you. Because this is what my soul yearns for. But I have a responsibility to the world to foster Love, and I am told that I am being trained in the best way.

But I disagree. With myself.

As an opportunist

I wept
whenever I could
and filled this bottle
which I now present to you
O my precious flower

may you live long
fed
by my tears

Epiphany

It is much easier to keep track of my money when I don't have any money.